Thinking from engines

16-11-2012

“My first blog post on the internet (exiting!), and I have already skipped the introduction. Great start. Well here goes, a little sketch I wrote for my book called Orb-e. I don’t know when it will be finished but I felt like sharing this inspirational moment I had, with the world. I hope you like it, because I loved writing it. The music I listened to while writing was the song called freedom by David Housden, part of the Thomas was alone video game soundtrack. I through it would be fun to let you know my inspiration.“

As Jake heard the sound of the engines roaring, he started to feel lonely on his own ship. It was full of crew and live, but at this late hour, no one bothered him. It was nice to have some time for himself once in a while. It always ended up at thinking about what could have been. He trough about many things; how much he felt the need for Evelyn’s eggs; Shell’s love; Robert’s playfulness; home. At the end he would always find himself depressed one way or another. He would go to bed and dream his worries away. But somehow this was relaxing to him. The muffled sound of the energy generator rotating around its axis, waving constant air against his face made him feel vulnerable and fragile. Made him feel more like himself. He leaned against the railing of one of the balconies that were made to view the massive technologically marvel that was the energy generator. He had absolutely no clue how the thing worked, but somehow it attracted energy from all around the universe by polarity. The specifics were far beyond him, but this magical machine provided the ship with enough power to energize every part of the ship under normal circumstances. He literally look at the pulse of the electricity all day and dream away in its beauty.  You could see energy flow from the top to the bottom and back. See the beams of pure light that crossed into the middle and formed the pure energy. The perfect sphere was even more a wonder to look at then the rest. It looked like a dying star somewhere far, far away in some galaxy. The energy flowed around the cube like the sun flairs would do on Orb-e. He used to see holographic pictures of his star at the observatory at his former school. It brought him back to the past, the life he had been living so eagerly. Many times he wished for this to be over, so he could return to his school and just finish his life as he had pictured it years ago. But deep in his mind he knew all too well that wasn’t going to happen.

 Even if the war had ended right now, he would find a message through space that is was over, he wouldn’t be able to return. Not back to how it was. His peaceful life. It reminded him that he would have never met Shell if all had never happened. Maybe he would have had a relationship with one of the girls that would stand by the fountain. Maybe even the one he used to like so much. Maybe…, no he shouldn’t think like that. He had her now, although she didn’t think so anymore. He knew it wasn’t all his fault. At least, not in the beginning. But then he was so focused, so obsessed with this burden he had to bear right now, that he had almost forgotten her. Just as they had wanted. They told him he would be finished, and he would, if he had not found what he did. The planet was once again, in grave danger. The pure dark was done with playing, he was out to kill every single one of them, although they didn’t know why. For some odd reason the pure dark had an unstoppable hatred for the human race. He couldn’t put his finger on why. But it was there, and he needed to stop that from happening. He had to search the whole galaxy on his own to find help. Help that might not even come on time, or come at all. The only thing he knew that the fate of the entire race was on his shoulders. If he didn’t find what they were looking for all was lost. It crossed his mind more than a thousand times, what would happen if they would fail. But he couldn’t show that to his teammates, he needed to be an eternal flame burning with hope, passion and prosperity. Else, they would all lose hope and all would be for nothing.

 This troubled him the most, there was nobody on the entire ship that could listen to his troubles, his frustrations. Nobody to turn to if things got bad. No shoulder to lean on, no comforting words to ease him, no love to give or take and no soft hands to wipe his tears away. The tears would fall on the floor beneath him. Evaporate into gas on touch with the heated metal. Flow right back into his lounges as he sniffed and gasped for air. He would have to do that all on his own. He slammed his hand onto the railing and didn’t even feel the pain that would hunt him tomorrow. He wanted to end it, sometimes, but he couldn’t. He had no luxury to do so. Tomorrow his crew would expect him to come smiling out of his room and welcome the hard working marines to the morning clock. Every day of the week, if he was actually happy or not. Mostly not. But he tried to be, it was easier that way for everybody.

 He had other things to get his mind of off these thoughts. Like a game of cards or sporting with the other soldiers on the ship. Sometimes he would spar with the men who dared to face him, or for a revenge. He always won, but sometimes let the other party win for good measure. Some needed that extra push in the right direction, some excitement to keep practicing and keep the mussels growing. Weight lifting had also become some sort of a hobby. He wanted to be able to be effective without the suit and the augmentations it brought. What if it failed, or it damaged beyond repair. He still would need to go on. His superiors always stressed that he shouldn’t be doing that, and the scientists found that the suit would be more effective if he would keep it on all day. But the thing wasn’t nearly comfortable enough for long periods like that.

“Enough writing for me, it is around 01:00 am in the morning and it is time for me to quite and go to bed. Catch some sleep so I can study tomorrow at a semi-reasonable time of the day. Wish me luck and I hope you liked the sketch I did. Thanks for Reading and until next time, stay creative!”